Monday, August 27, 2012

Field of Dreams

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August 27th, 2012

The freshly cut grass greets me as the aroma tantalizes my senses. There's nothing better than stepping on the grass of an open field filled with possibilities. The sight before me is endless in my field of dreams. It's where I can be a kid again and frolic in the wide-open spaces.


This field is where I can discover my youth again. Like a kid, I run and play, remembering when I was a child playing freeze tag with all my friends. To be young again with my friends would indeed be remarkable! The soft grass beneath my bare feet comforts me by allowing me to reminisce about my youthful innocence before discovering life's harsh realities. Why does my fountain of youth only exist in my memories?


It's out here on these green canvases between the white lines that mark off the field as I run from line to line. It's the orange dirt woven into the fabric of Mother Nature's lush green carpet. My youth can be found in the frolicking kite hovering high above my kids. It floats in the wind and surveys those on the land enjoying life unfolding around us. Gliding along the breeze, the plastic flaps make a snapping sound. The sound gently floats down, only to drown in my kid's laughter. The fountain is found in the drinks that quench my soul while I share a drink with my kids as we enjoy a picnic on top of the green surface, smiling while we watch others play around us.


It is easy to find joy in others, especially children because they know no better about life other than the green pastures out in front of them. They don't worry about that kite falling from the sky or other children at play running into them. They don't care if they fall on the field because they get back up, ignoring daddy's appeal to "shake it off." They don't care about the ants that may find their way to our food as we sit in our perfect picnic spot. They live as we used to, without real thought and planning for the future. They live in the moment. 


This field is where I want to be. I want to run off all my fears and force them to the sidelines. I want my worries to drain from my sweat and leave them on the field so I may feel like myself again. 


I am still determining what I can envision doing in this large swath of land. The possibilities are endless. And it isn't hard to reminisce about those crisp fall days when the day was in its twilight. The cool air rushes into your lungs as you take deep breaths, allowing it to wake up your soul. The field lights brighten, overtaking the sun's weak rays. Forcing them to retreat back into the sky as you stand in amazement. At the same time, I admire the bright orange sky clashing with the clear blue atmosphere as the darkness begins to shroud it, forcing it to sleep so that life may regroup and start anew.


This field is where life starts. It is where our food is grown, and our animals roam. We build our homes here, where the roots of our family are formed. It is a place where endless possibilities are only limited by our imagination. 


This field is where I can again find myself in the joy of my children's laughter and fun while I watch them play, much like I used to. Where they live like I used to live, in the carefree spaces. 


They know where I long to be as they grab my hand and pull me onto their field. They want me to live a life, their life, the one they only know. I want to play in their field of dreams so I can remember what my dreams used to be. They want me to enjoy life and play and to be a kid again with them. Today, I will forget that I am an adult with responsibility and will partake in their field of dreams, and we will be one.


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Christopher Fusaro. The author of Captain Imperfecto.

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