Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Sensible

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Christopher (left) Nico (right) and their Guardians of the Galaxy look. October 31, 2017.


November 27, 2917


Being sensible is a good way at dealing with anything that overwhelms your emotions. Take my 2 kids for instances. They are currently screaming and yelling at each other as they ride their bikes up and down the street. My ears are ringing as they attempt to scream over one and other. My blood pressure is rising. My head is throbbing. My ears are ringing.

The neighbors are watching these 2 as they lob their frustrations of brotherly competition at each other. I want to scream at them to, stop! But I will only be assisting them in their chaos. I suppose jumping around ranting and raving, all the while insisting that they, "be quite!" would't be, sensible.

The sensible thing would be to walk out to the street, wave my arms, indicating to them I want to talk to them. And calmly explain to both those boys that they should be good, human, beings. That is the sensible thing to do. Albeit the most responsible thing to do, as a parent.

“Go in the house and stop yelling at each other,” I sensibly say.

“No! It’s Nico,” the youngest yells.

My new neighbors are mesmerized by what will happen next. Will I be the sensible, daddy? Understanding, nurturing, loving, and understanding.

“Go inside the house, please,” I sensibly tell him. But along with my sensible tone I give him the bulging eyeballs of, “get the heck in the house” glare.

“No!”

Clinching my teeth I calmly, sternly and of course, sensibly announce, “get in that house.”
My bulging eyes receed into pin point laser piercing looks. And now my skin turns red. The crackle of my teeth could be heard for miles around. I didn’t dare look away. It was a stare so frightening that he dropped his bike and ran into the house.

the metal bike made clanking sounds as it bounced off the asphalt.  I close my eyes and squeezed my face until my skin turned purple.

Sensible, Chris.

Sensible is the new woosah.

“Wow, daddy. I never knew you could turn that shade of red. What color do you call that,” Nico asked.


“Sensibly red,” I said.


Captain Imperfecto seeing a play. The book of Mormon. November 25, 2017.

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