Monday, November 14, 2016

Do- Over

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Honeymoon Disney Cruise aboard the Disney Cruise ship, Dream. November 4, 2016
Nico left. Christopher right.


November 14, 2016


I wish “do-overs” could be handed out to people like the car’s Oprah Winfrey would give away during one of her television shows as she shouts her iconic phrase “you get a car and you get a car…”

“You get a do-over!!”

“And you get a do-over!”

“And you!”

and so on.

What I'm trying to convey to you is that your current situation is not a life sentence. And that if life handed you an opportunity to reset or a "do-over" you should jump on that opportunity. 

People have hard lives and it's easy to stop participating in society. But being a victim or sitting on the sidelines and watching the rest of the people live their easy life won’t help your current situation get better. Things won't be given to you. Most people aren't born lucky. Your chances of getting a car on Oprah is like your chances of winning the lottery. The chances are slim to none. 

When my life took a turn for the worst I sat on my hands and felt sorry for myself. Eventually I found strength to go out and fight for what I believe in which was my kids.And I forged ahead taking my wife's death with me and attempted to live again with a greater purpose. Why should I continue to feel sorry for myself? No one cares about my success more than me. All my friends have moved on past my loss.

Do I have to subscribe to my misery? I shouldn't when I can acknowledge that everyone has a story to tell about grief and misery but somehow other people survived it. You are not alone. Every one of us has taken the long road before success strikes. Those moments test are ability to survive and function in this world.. So stop testing yourself and believe in yourself and get it done right the first time.  Do not resign to your fate. Just realize, YOU are worthy of good things.

Did a life lesson set you back? Push forward. Things for you are harder then they should be? Fight back for greatness. Other people seem to be more successful than you? Go out and grab success because frankly, no one will care more than you what is going on in your life. Don’t like the election? Fight for what you believe in and make the vote count next time.

I can’t pinpoint why I have such a hard time getting things I want accomplished the first time. Sure, it’s easy for me to write how positive I am in my blogs but acting on those good things is so much more fulfilling than talking about.. How do I begin to think better and change how I feel about myself when I fail?

I want to make better decisions that will stop the negativity in my life. “Achieve it, Chris.” But just the other day when I placed my faith in being positive I still failed! That makes me question why did I have faith in it to begin with when I felt deep down that being positive would magically turn it around.

Where is my motivation?

I look for the good things in life. We all go through some sort of small bouts of depression that change our way of thinking. That depression can destroy any “rah- rah” pep speech we may give ourselves in order to talk ourselves into doing greater things tomorrow.  Failing after I decided to look at life positively just to be negative gain isn’t where I want to be in this life. It’s time to just be positive that life will work out during the times I fail and I continue to believe that good things will happen for good people when those good people don’t give up.

It is okay to fear the unknown when we anticipate something will go bad during our happy moments. It is okay to get your hopes up for something that may not happen because it is the hope that releases happiness. And in that happiness we find the strength to recover if we don't get it. Not everyone is a winner. People that are winners have failed before but the key difference is that they learned about themselves in the process of losing and corrected what the needed to fix in order to achieve good things. For you to win you must work harder to believe in yourself.

I'm not all words here. I took my own advice. I have decided to let you, the readers, know what I have been cooking up over here in my world. I have decided to live life again after the death of my twins and my wife. I have to jump on my do-over before life's negativity beats me down. And by living this life I gave in and allowed my happiness to take over.

I got remarried.

I never thought a women could love me more than she loves herself and never in my wildest dreams would thing a girl would take on the responsibility of a widowed man and his 2 young children. Especially after all the turmoil I caused in my own life over the years since my wife died. The ups and downs that I fought through to find this place in my life was the hardest road I had to travel. I found a person who loves the boys and me. I decided to jump on the opportunity by doing a do-over of my life.

The only advice I can give to you is to live your life while your in the present and do your best to learn and move on from the past. Do your best to be positive because being negative is way to easy to dismiss the good you deserve. Live life without hesitation because we will never get younger. 

I’m happy. And I don’t have to pretend it is due to Oprah pointing at me and with her lovely voice yelling, “you get a do-over!” I give myself a do-over. I allow myself to be positive and I will allow myself to enjoy the good things that may be heading my way.

I'm still afraid that my happiness will be sabotaged so I'm treading lightly. But who am I to stop my future wife's happiness? That girl walked into my life and has made my world a better place. She loves those kids as if they were hers. I accept my do-over and I challenge you to do the same and to disregard whatever demon you're fighting. Now that is positive thinking. If this blog wasn't motivating enough then imagine I'm pointing at you and yelling , "You, just got a do-over!"








Taking a selfie while teaching a class. Nov. 7, 2016
Don't worry they were on break!


Christopher Fusaro. The author of Captain Imperfecto.

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