July 16th, 2013
Decisions, decisions, decisions. We all have to make them almost every day of our lives. At times, we just have to make the most simple of decisions:
My sons are going to school today.
To the hard mental decisions:
I am going to the gym today.
And maybe argue with that decision:
No, you’re not. Yes, I am. Maybe I’ll go. Ugh, I don’t know, it’s getting late. Well, suppose I go to the gym today. In that case, I already know I can’t go tomorrow because of work, so it’ll be a waste of time to go today, so I’ll go when I can on consecutive days. Okay, settled. NO GYM. Ugh! I feel fat, gym maybe.
Other times, decisions about food can complicate life, especially at a restaurant:
Oh, I love the lobster ravioli! What’s this I’m reading? A f**king calorie total at the end of the food description!?
Moving to the sensible decision:
What’s on the low-carb menu? Chicken, “ the chicken has mango salsa, is fresh and tangy... I like mangos. But I love lobster. Why the hell is that, I see? A calorie counter there inserted in the menu next to this delicious ravioli description? Who the hell made this menu? It’s an Italian restaurant, all the food is fatty!
When I’m so tired, the decision to get up and contribute to society can make me just want to fall back to sleep.:
But I have to work. That obligation alone should prepare me to get up, yet I like to decide at the last minute when I should get up by gauging the time when I’ll walk into the office:
Okay, it’s 6:05 am. If I hit snooze now, I’ll get up at 6:15, shower, dress, and forget breakfast. I’ll get on the road by 7:00 am and miss the mad traffic rush that happens every rush hour at exactly 7:05 am.
Or:
I could get up now without hitting the snooze button. I can shower, get dressed, eat, and leave well before the 7:05 traffic rush. And I would get to work with some spare time to linger in the break room. Sounds like a plan!
Hmm, however though:
If I skip the shower, I can stop on my way to work and get a breakfast sandwich at Dunkin Donuts. No, no time for Dunkin. I could run into the store next to the office building and grab a Redbull.
Sweet!
Hmm, but I would like to shower.
It wakes me up. I could just sleep up until the very last minute. Then, the common sense section of my brain will kick in. It will automatically compel me to get up without thinking, without decisions. It will force me to get dressed. And go straight to work.
Ugh, these decisions!
I need to find the motivation without thinking about having to decide what motivates me to get my ass in gear. The only situation that does that is my children. My kids inspire me. I do everything for them without thinking. It’s second nature. Eat / food. Sleep/bed. Dirty / shower. Bored / play. Hurt/ love. Angry/ love. Sad/ love, even more. Maybe I can bottle that up.
If I pray more, that may motivate me. But I can’t decide if I want to be religious.
I grew up religious. I woke up every Sunday and went to Catholic mass. I believe in god. But I can’t decide if that’s where I’m now life. So, the decision to pray will be left to Saturday night lotto drawings, for now. Or maybe not. Who knows? I should pray, always.
What if I send a chain email that one email that reads, “I will have the power of decision if I email this to 10 friends.”
Don’t worry. My kids will learn about religion, but when will they? Okay, moving on. I think. I can’t decide.
There is so much going on in my life. I have so much to do and no time to do it. There just aren’t enough hours in the day. Unless I move into overtime and do what I need to do during regular sleeping hours. But then I would lack sleep. I’ll just be more direct in deciding to cut those hours.
That will minimize the time into the minutes I need to be productive. That’s it. I’ll do what I need to do, but at the moment, I have to do it. But that could change. I mean, what if I had to choose a different time to replace the hour for something I no longer needed at that moment? How do I decide what to replace it with?
That last paragraph was a space filler because I can’t decide when to end this blog. There seems to always be a decision to make!
Decisions, decisions.
808 words.
